Fri the 13th: Superstitions are bad luck 🍀
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"Mirror, mirror on the wall; who's the luckies— 🫤
... shit, it cracked! What a way to start the day. And not just any day... TO-day. Friday the 13th...
Now, I normally don't believe in superstitions (they're bad luck), but this was a bit ominous... I felt like Pacino in Carlito's Way when they were in the boat, headed to break Taglialucci out of jail..
"Bad start, Jack."
And so today, TO-day; I decided to beat the allegations of the 13th, and have a good old fashioned lucky day. But I had some work to do, I'd already lost a mirror.
As I was putting on for good measure, I felt my phone vibrate.
📳📱*Mom calling* 📳📱
Not now, Mama, I gotta bounce.
Now, normally I take the sidewalk to work, but today it was storming, so I considered driving instead to stay dry...
"🤔 But then again, why change my routine on today, of all days? That's what they WANT me to do. Nope. That'd be asking for it. Plus, I don't believe in superstitions anyway, they're bad luck."
I took the same ole sidewalk 🫡 .
Headed out the door for my walk, I snatched my umbrella from the closet, and (of course) it popped wide-open like a butterfly fresh out the damn cocoon; right there in my foyer (pronounced foy-yay). What the hell?!
*sigh*
I trudged on with my day. I had to — the streets were calling...
🚶🏽♂️I hit the sidewalk...
Half way to work, and I was still out of it. Wasn't really looking where I was going, clumsily traversing the concrete, when my phone vibrated (again).
📳📱📳📱 *Mom calling* 📳📱📳📱
Eh, no time for that. It was raining, and I was officially late!
As I walked, I started to realize all the little things I hadn't noticed back at the house. My chain's clasp was showing to the front, my watch was on the wrong wrist, my blacks didn't match... 🥴
But fuck bad luck... it was Friday the 13th, I had on my lucky drawers, and it's not like I believed in superstitions anyway 🙈 🤞🏽. I figured things would start looking up at any moment.
🚶🏽♂️I kept walking on the sidewalk...
Next, I saw a black cat cross my path to my left, "Aren't those supposed to be unlucky?", I thought. "Or maybe they're lucky when they cross your path to the right?" As I pulled my out phone to Google my fate...
📳📱📳📱 *Mom calling* 📳📱📳📱
I'll call her when I get into the office; I was almost there, anyway.
As I walked all over that sidewalk, a glimmer caught my eye. It was a penny laying on heads! Excuse me... a lucky penny laying on heads. About damn time! I'll be late for that.
I darted toward it to pick it up, only to realize that it was laying directly underneath a construction ladder 🙄
💭 Hmmm. Now, I could either simply leave the good-luck penny there, right under the bad-luck ladder, and keep it moving, OR I could just grab it as quickly as I could, construction be damned, and get out of there...💭
Let's just say I chose the... ladder. I desperately needed something to change my fate. Penny. In. Pocket. Good luck activated!
🚶🏽♂️I continued up the sidewalk...
I was losing it, now. What could this all mean?
Let's see... After all, I had a pretty good track record with this stuff:
It was just the other week that I was eating collard greens and black eyed peas on New Years, just like I was supposed to, so I knew something good was bound to happen ✅ I even threw some salt over my shoulder while I was cooking it for good measure ✅ Dems the rules, and I followed 'em.
I'd never shook on a deal with my left hand ✅, nor split the pole ✅. I even responded to that chain letter my mom sent me that one time, so I shoul—
📳📱📳📱 *Mom calling* 📳📱📳📱
Not now, mama, this sidewalk is giving me hell.
—so I should be good ✅!
And it was at that very moment, that my hand started itching. Real bad, but I knew not to scratch it. No sir! I'd surely be coming into some money soon. Plus, that was the hand my umbrella was in, and it was pouring, remember?
And while we're on the topic of weather, I hope no one was getting married that day. That's can't be good, right? The rain? No no no... maybe it IS good? I couldn't keep up anymore.
As I walked into the front door of the office, the clock read 11:11. Aha! I was late, but I was LUCKY! You better believe that.
I kissed my new penny, and sat at my desk. It felt good to know I was lucky. I knew superstitions were bad luck, anyway.
I smiled, turned my laptop on, and called my Mama back.
Turns out she broke her back somehow. Said it was my fault??!?! Something about the sidewalk. IDK, I felt bad, but I couldn't really relate. Looks like we know who the unlucky one in the family is 🤷🏽♂️🍀
For Lack of a Wetter Bird, call your Mama back.
Stop what you're doing and make a wish.. it's 11:11 somewhere.
*Audio Book*
Alright, if your mom is like my mom, then maybe you have some funny stories up your sleeve. I do too, and actually wrote about one in my upcoming ebook/audio book, Home Less in Dallas. It's one of EIGHT short stories in the collection releasing later this year.
You should check it out. Here's the INTRO chapter of the audio book. If you don't like it, listen again!
ICYMI, I wrote something new.
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